Difficult to Say

Hunting for a job has proved to be more challenging than I first thought it would be. The first day of hunting involves sending out a resume to a whole lot of people. But, then day by day there are not as many postings for job as there was that first day. I have interviewed for a few jobs, but have had no luck as of yet. I wish I were more like my friend Rachel when we were young. Every job that Rachel interviewed for, she got hired. Once she even asked 7 peaks, in her interview, if they would hire her best friend Becky too and they did. She had an innate charm about her that made employers want to hire her. I wish I had that.

Matt and I are coming down to the wire with his job. Many of you know now that we haven't had money coming in for a couple months now. We had enough savings to last us, but the well is drying up and we may have to jump ship with his job. I am still looking for some full time work to float us a for a few more months and hopefully it will come soon. Thank you to those of you who have already sent me job leads. I have definitely taken advantage of those things. Unfortunately, nothing has panned out yet, but I will keep trying.

Life often plays little tricks on us when things are down and we have definitely been experiencing that. First, our dishwasher broke, then our kitchen aid, then Matt's car, and this week it was our air conditioner. Thankfully, we are surrounded by family and friends who really love us and we have been able to fix and overcome these little trials. I can't express how grateful Matt and I are to those of you who have helped us in little and big ways already. I think that one of the hardest things to do is admit that you need help and then actually accept that help. It is difficult to JUST say, "thank you," and not say anything else. But, I thank you.

I often think that I get comfortable in the life that I am living and life needs to give me a little kick in the pants to make me change my course. That is how I am viewing our situation. Perhaps Matt and I need to change things, perhaps it is time for me to work and Matt to be a stay at home Daddy for a little while. I'm not sure what the future holds for our little family, but I have faith that we will be okay. I know that if we do everything that we are suppose to be doing, the Lord will help us fill in the gaps and we will receive the things that we need.

I know that the Lord often uses other people to answer prayers, but it is difficult to accept when it comes. I wonder if it would be easier to accept if everything got fixed magically rather than in logical ways. Like, "poof" my Kitchen Aid magically healed itself. Probably not.

Either way, I feel very positive about the future. I know that this adventure that we are on will be of great value to us, so I have to try and find the lesson in this part of my life. I am happy. I have a great life, a wonderful husband, and the most beautiful daughter in the world. Everything else is just frosting on the cake. I just really love the frosting.