Friday, November 03, 2006

Make the Madness Stop Already!

Justin's lamo post could not be the first thing that my blog viewers see, so I had to put up something new. I've been serioiusly slacking my blog duties as of late and I'm thinking that that has got to stop.

I'm always working and when I'm not working, my social calendar is always very full, and I think to myself, "How did I ever have time when I was in school?" Between work and school, I'm not sure how or if I had a social life at all! Now, I have so many social demands on me that I have to often turn people down. It is so hard being popular AND beautiful.

The other night, at Buffy night, there was a birthday/halloween themed event and it was buckets of fun as we ate and caroused... until... They (the group) were picking out a movie to watch (of the scary variety) and they had begun shouting about one that they wanted to watch. I politely and quietly asked someone by me what the movie was rated (I don't watch movies with an R rating), she continued to shout the question to the crowd. The crowd responded, "Does it matter?" She said that it did, and the movie was rated R and everyone realized that said girl was asking on behalf of me. Then it just got really awkward because some still shouted for the R movie, while others (the host included) said that we could watch a different movie. I said that it was no big deal and I would just cut out of the party earlier. There were many protests to this statement. They did not want me to leave, but they wanted to watch their movie, so one individual checked the rating content in an effort to pursuade me to watch because there was only nudity, sexual content, violence and language that made the rating R. I declined said watching and a PG-13 movie was chosen. But, then, other party attenders left because they didn't want to watch the PG-13 movie. This just made me feel really guilty and out of place because I was the only one who did not wish to watch the R movie, so I once again said that I was taking off, again to great protest. So, the other avid R watchers departed not long after the PG-13 started.

So, in response to this whole experience, I wonder why some people are so afronted or offended by those who don't want to watch some content and try to force their viewing choices on others. I did not try to force my viewing choice on the rest of the group, I simply attempted to remove myself from the situation so that others may do as they please. But, some found this distasteful because they would feel guilty if I left the party. Why would they feel guilt for a choice that I am making? Why would others try to pursuade me to act as they do? Why would some become so offended by the situation that they leave? It is perplexing to me.

The whole situation made me extremely uncomfortable, and though I am normally perfectly comfortable around these people, (though many hold different beliefs than I) this was the first time that I was not comfortable in the least.

In conclusion, I'm going to stay away from Buffy night for a bit because it left me with an unsettling feeling.

36 comments:

Justin said...

Beckster,

While you're not going to Buffy night, feel free to join me on "doing homework on whatever night it is that you do Buffy night" night. I do it every week.

Also...BLAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGG!!

Justin said...

Oh, and everyone go check out the amazing 37 posts lineup on the picture of Becky and Matt!

Sigma said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Becky said...

No need to post about not posting an opinion. We aren't going to see it either way.

Justin why don't I just do your homework for you? I don't guarantee that it will be correct or worth anything, but I'd be glad to fill in blanks with things like, "blarg."

Just because there is a blank, doesn't mean that it is an invitation to write nonsense. Or I'll go write nonsense on your Justin Head museum. Every Justin forehead will have the word "blarg" written on it.

Sarah said...

So, I had a similar experience to my Baby's on Halloween night...only I was being singled out and was more vocal about my wanting the person who was badgering me to shutup and leave me alone. My conclusion is this: people who try to get you to conform to their lower values are actually ashamed of the fact that they have these lower values. Being thus ashamed they try to justify their ways by getting as many people as possible to join them...and if they don't, they get offended, because those with higher values have now refused to validate them as they so wanted. The end.

Justin said...

Now, here's some food for thought: This "rating" system that we use in the United States...who decides it? Is it the First Presidency? A board of ecclesiastical leaders from many faiths and organizations? A body of elected moralists?

Actually, it's just Hollywood. (Don't get me started about the ratings-only-indicate-intended-audience stuff) So, if you're aligning yourself strictly on a rating system--decided by people in Hollywood who may or may not hold the same values as you--as opposed to judging for yourself whether or not a movie deserves your time and attention...are your standards really any "higher" than those of others, or do you simply have a metric to apply to them, i.e. a "grading system" that can quantify your values?

Think about it.

Oh, and the "Rated R" church "doctrine" only happens to exist in the USA. The plurality of church members (who live outside the united states) have no idea what that means and decide for themselves what movies they should or shouldn't watch. Anyway, food for thought.

Becky--I actually turn in most of my homework with nothing but "Blarg" and "Honk" written on it, but if you'd like to help on non-Buffy night you'd be more than welcome since your handwriting is much nicer than mine :)

Sigma said...

Justin...I couldn't have said it better!!! I COMPLETELY agree! Now! Rationalize my tattoo. ;)

Sarah said...

Justin is actually right...except what he was going for may not be the fact that we shouldn't watch a single rated R movie, and shouldn't watch most of the PG-13s, if not all of them. And though HOllywood does make the ratings they are based on a set of rules that have a cast of morality to them. Just because they aren't religious leaders or moralists persay, doesn't mean that they don't know what a child or 13 year old should be watching...they have some shadow of an idea. So you're right Justin, we should judge for ourselves, which good judgement would probably come down to a lack of Rated R or PG-13 movies. Oh and Josh, no one gives a crap about your tattoo, and there's no rationalizing it, though I'm sure you wish there were. Tough luck, go watch a Rated R movie and feel validated in some tiny, infinitesimal way.

Goddess said...

Pretty much, I agree with Baby, though I'd like to add that people who try to convince you to do anything you're not comfortable (no matter what the reason) are just jerks and morons, who have no place being allowed into society.

Justin said...

Wow...I wonder what your moral standards say about venomously degrading another person...I guess anything goes as long as you watch the right movies.

Justin said...

Oh, and I agree with Goddess, except for the "have no place being allowed into society" bit, because from my understanding, that's pretty much 98% of the people in this society ("this" meaning the whole of Homo sapiens in general).

Mc said...

My turn.

Movies = bad. Pretty much all of them. There's one or two that come out every year that are actually good.

Ratings...are superfluous....(sp?) Can you rate a person? Their lifestyle? IF so I think we're all rated R+++ 'cuz life is just that way. So, when I can ESCAPE that rated life for a moment through a movie, great! I don't need a movie to consolidate and exacerbate the problem that is life, and I don't need it to show me how life is. I already know. I'm here to escape the rated life and would prefer something GOOD. So, Gimme Spiderman 3. Lemme watch fun with Dick and Jane (Saw it last night. I understood all the spanish and the corporate talk) or throw me a lil' CG animated film. I'm good with it.

Oh, and I think its time to blog.

Sigma said...

WOW. What a hot topic. And for the record: I was being SARCASTIC & a little satirical about the tat and rationalization of said ink. While I agree with Justin about the films, there seemed to be a lot of rationalization in various posts, so I was going with it. Also, I agree with Justin about the systematic CHOOSING of what morals to follow and which not. Until someone can claim they have NO faults, there should be no judging or insulting. So, do what you wanna' do if you feel it's right and we'll see where it gets you, even if that means R-rated films (which ARE superfluous and ALMOST meaningless)or multiple piercings or even TATTOOS (REAL ones OF COURSE... ;)

Becky said...

I'm thinking that for me, my choice against the R rated movies is based on my own set of morals. My morals tell me to follow the words of the prophet when he says to stay away from R rated movies and media of bad content. This also means that all of my movie choices should be selective, and I try to follow that standard.
Though life may be rated R at times, it doesn't mean that MY life is or that I need to subject myself to it more than I need to. I don't know about anyone else, but in my life, I have never sawed off someone's limbs before or after having sex with them and then swear a lot about getting blood on my clothes. So, I'm gonna have to say that my life isn't a rated R film.
Though Hollywood may make up the rating, it doesn't mean that they are wrong.
What I don't understand is why people look down on others who are simply trying to keep things that aren't uplifting away from themselves. I'm going to have to agree with Baby on this one and Lisa. Girl power.

Sarah said...

Woot wooters, couldn't have said it better Babes. Rationalization is just that, rationalizing something you're doing wrong because you don't want to feel like it's wrong anymore.

Justin said...

Yeah....I dunno, I guess I just can't go with close-minded bigotry as easily as some. But I'll stop there.

Sigma said...

Few things: First, I agree with Becky, SOMEWHAT. I mostly agree with Justin. Not because I'm trying to rationalize something, or some other cookie-cutter Primary class response, but because, in all honesty, it seems to me that lumping ANYONE who doesn't practice the same morals as you into ONE category IS a little narrow-minded (no offense intended). I'll agree, there ARE people out there who will judge, belittle, and laugh at those who don't agree with their "moral" standing (Take a look at MOST of the "Christians" in the South). But, there are ALSO people, at least in MY experience, who understand, who will just drop the topic and move on. I, myself, watch R-rated films, and I won't comment on my feelings of the rating system, but when I know that someone who DOESN'T watch R-rated films and movies is coming to visit or stay at my house, I'll PLAN on not watching any; I even select a few movies as options. So it seems a little unfair to bunch EVERYONE who disagrees with someone else into a single category. NOTHING is single-sided. So, basically, people should just live their lives as best they can and to THEIR moral standards, and in the end, hopefully people will realize that this isn't a race; there is no competition, and that we only have ourselves to answer for. There are FEW people who have the right to deem a person worthy or UNworthy of being "allowed in society" and I, for one, don't want to try. If someone wants to do something I don't agree with, that's their choice; it makes them no less of a person than anyone else. Should I stop associating with, and loving, my mom and brother-in-law because of their "lifestyle" choices? Should I insult them because I don't agree with them? No. If someone wants to insult people they don't like or agree with, fine, that's their perogative, but we ALL answer for ourselves sooner or later. Well, that's my spiel, and I hope I didn't offend anyone. I ALSO hope it won't be deleted since I plan on making this my LAST post on this blog. So, in conclusion: Becky, congrats, in advance, on your wedding. Everyone else, to some degree or another, I respect you and wish everyone the best.

Goddess said...

I never said people shouldn't be allowed into society because of their lifestyle choices, simply when they try to force that lifestyle onto somebody else. I love how my comment about lifestyle freedom (in all its forms) has now been supposed to be this terrible elitist thing, but I stand by what I said--if you are mean to people, you shouldn't be around them.

Sarah said...

Right...so I don't remember any of us saying that every single person who watches R rated movies is evil and that they are trying to force their standards on us...ever. In fact, Becky talked about the people who did watch R rated movies who were trying to make HER more comfortable, and in my group of 6 friends I was the only one who held my standards yet only the one friend was trying to force his on me. So, I'm very unsure as to where you guys are pulling this narrow mindedness from considering the fact that our only statement has been that R rated movies are bad, I never said the people watching them were. Though, I must say you guys got incredibly defensive and you yourselves jumped to the preposterous conclusions of us being "close minded bigots". In my experience, people get angry and defensive for just a few reasons, but i'll leave that to the imagination; doing my best not to be a close, and narrow, minded bigot. So, final statement, R rated movies=bad, people who watch them=not bad, people who try to force their value systems on you unwantedly=bad, people who jump to offensive conclusions=annoying. Thank you and good night.

Justin said...

Goddess--

I didn't suppose anything about what you said. I was referring to your statement: "I'd like to add that people who try to convince you to do anything you're not comfortable (no matter what the reason) are just jerks and morons, who have no place being allowed into society."

I meant that a large portion of people in society are the kinds that try to convince you to do anything you're not comfortable with. And here I'm talking by and large. Everyone has an agenda of sorts, whether you're a salesman, a political activist, a missionary, or just an outspoken blog-poster (such as myself). Note that the motives change between these examples, but the action is basically the same.

I didn't mean to suppose anything from your statement and I'm sorry if I came across that way. When I wrote that response I felt that I had stayed pretty close to what you typed.

Justin said...

Oh, and I think we should be done with this, since it is obvious that each of us already has a camp we're entrenched in.

So...anything good on TV last night? Oh wait...nevermind.

Becky said...

Since when am I getting married? I wish people would tell me that I am getting married before I get congratulations so that I don't look like an idiot.
Oh, and I agree with Justin. Topic needs to be dropped. Unless we are talking about my Non-wedding!

Goddess said...

Could you have a non-wedding party? I'd really enjoy that.

Mc said...

I found out the other week that I have a girlfriend. I'd still like to meet her. Though my marraige date is supposedly Jan. 9th

Marie said...

Stop talking about marriage!
I hate marriage!!
Mostly I hate the fact that I'm not married!
And probably never will be!!!!!
Hate it!

Goddess said...

No, no, we need to throw Marie a non-wedding party. A "Marriage? Yeah right!" lovely day where we celebrate her singleness. That would be good.

Justin said...

Mike, what's this girlfriend you discovered you had? And Becky didn't know she was getting married? Doesn't ANYONE in your family PAY ATTENTION to their RELATIONSHIPS?!??!?!?!?! HOW DOES THIS EVEN HAPPEN??!! THIS DOESN'T SEEM PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE!!! I'LL KILL YOU!!!

Ummm...yes...marriage party...I probably can't come, but...send me cake and stuff. Or, you know, just tell me to come over and eat all your cake. I don't care if it's a reception or a non-marriage party. I'm not particular.

Justin said...

And thank the maker, Becky has finally stopped kissing James Marsters!! His Brittish skin-flakes were starting to make a permanent seal from his cheek to your lips! And I was starting to worry if your spine had fused itself in that curve.

Welcome home Becky!!! We're so glad you've been set free!!

Becky said...

Yes, James and I have made a split. I decided that I needed my lips back because I had other uses for them. So, now it is just me as my pic. I know many are disappointed.

Goddess said...

How did something that sounds big happen here that I wasn't aware of?

Justin said...

Geez, where've you been, "goddess?" Way to miss all the important events in Beckster's life!

And you said you'd bake us a cake!

Goddess said...

No, well, I'm definately sure that one didn't happen. I don't promise things like that no matter how strung out I am.

Becky said...

*high pitched* You said you'd bake us a cake!

Sarah said...

*low pitched* You said you'd bake us a cake!

Justin said...

*begins doing the beatbox purcussion while the "You said you'd bake us a cake" soundbytes loop in alternation*

Justin said...

*BLARG!!! ....PERcussion......begins thumping his chest rhythmically in memory of a dear friend*