My Days Without Nicole

I hate the days that I have to drop my Nicole off at a sitter's house while I go off to work. Most days, Matt is home with Nicole and it is not difficult to go off to work because she is sleeping when I leave. But, some days Matt has a day where he goes up to Salt Lake to work and we have to find someone to watch Nicole. Yesterday was one of those days.

Momma Kimball was kind enough to watch Nicole for us yesterday. I dropped her off early on my way to work. She cried when I set her down in the house, she just wanted me to hold her and I just wanted to hold her, but I got her distracted and went off to work. I know that it is probably harder on me then it is on her when I leave because I get that heart wrenching feeling in my chest because I know that I will miss her so much. Luckily, she was a good little girl for her grandma and didn't cry too much.

I'm always glad to hear when she does well with the sitter, but then at the same time I feel sad when I'm told the stories of all the things she did that day and I just think that I missed it. I missed Nicoley playing in the yard with the hose and loving it. I missed her chasing the ducks at the park. I just miss my little girl.

Mondays are more difficult than other days because I've had the whole weekend with her and then I have to leave her again. Then, to have to leave her with someone who is not me and Matt is even more difficult. I just love my little one so much. I didn't know that I would love her this much back when I was pregnant with her. I was convinced that my baby hated me and that was why she was making me sick. But, despite the not fun-ness of pregnancy, she was all worth it. Just as this baby will be, I am sure.